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Bertrand Clerc

KimJongUnia

A red flower has spread throughout the Lake District in recent years. Both former North Korean dictators have had a flower created in their name, and persistent rumours attribute the unknown plant to the latest North Korean dictator, Kim Jong Un. It is said that the flower was designed to collect and enrich the uranium found in the surrounding grounds. The National Trust is blamed as the main perpetrator, which is said to use its vast lands to cultivate the flower and resell its weapon-grade produce on the black market. Other gossip claims the National Trust setup the phenomenon as a Loch-Ness-like tale in an attempt to attract more visitors.

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